A long long time ago (like 25 years) - I got angry with my Grandmother. I was reacting to a situation and raised my voice. It wasn't awful but it wasn't nice either. Something recently reminded me of this and I realized that I wanted to "clean it up".
Making amends is not really an easy thing to do - there are some possible negative consequences that I had thought of in this situation:
1. Maybe she doesn't even remember?
2. Perhaps it didn't really bother her?
3. Was I justified?
But the truth is that the admission is really a clearing FOR ME - and not my Grandmother. I did something that I determined was not good behavior and I wanted to admit and apologize for it FOR MYSELF. I was not attached to her thanking me.
So - I did it - and she just laughed. It felt GREAT. There is nothing that will bring two people closer than AUTHENTIC VULNERABILITY WITHOUT ATTACHMENT!
And then we just continued eating, with my hand next to hers.
BLiSS by Adeline.