Monday, June 9, 2014

Maybe you don't have all the information?

Have you ever been behind a car and getting impatient, maybe even honking at them, and then been embarrassed because there was someone crossing in front of them that you didn't see?

Or have you ever quickly judged the behavior of a stranger as rude, not knowing that actually they were aloof because of a life circumstance that had them in deep grieving?

Have you argued with a friend not realizing that they were doing something for you out of love and concern?
How about before jumping to conclusions, or getting angry, or disappointed, you have an open mind and try to see from another's point of view?
  Maybe even making a preposterous story that would excuse the annoying behavior?

Recently I played singles against a Woman who - after losing 6-1 6-2 against me - made some very rude comments.  I had options:

1.  I could attack her back (this used to be my favorite option)

2.  I could just ignore her but tell everyone about it later (gossiping)

3.  I could ask her why she is speaking to me like that (and get bullied some more)

4.  Or - and this takes work - I could really feel immense love for her - not sympathy but empathy!

In order to be able to stay centered and kind to a bully, I have to go deep and realize that what she is saying to me is not true and I am loved.  And then-

1.  I move into extreme empathy by trying to imagine that these actions right now are not how she really feels about me, but a reflection of how she actually feels about herself.

2.  I forgive myself for the times that I have maybe behaved in the same way. 

3.  I look for the gift in the situation - what can I learn from this exchange?

4.  I release the negative energy by sending love her way.

This practice used to take weeks, and then days, and now it can just minutes!
  When I release judgment on how others "should" treat me - and focus on being the best Woman that I can be - life is so much happier.  And for me, being a good human involves:

1.  Loving all parts of myself deeply.

2.  Surrender and allow where possible.

3.  Do what I need to do for success and happiness.

4.  Be kind and gentle with myself and others.

5.  Use experiences to expand and open further!

6.  Be generous with my empathy, time, love and knowledge.

Cheers to self love and loving all other beings too!

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